Meeting Grace: The Blog

I could get used to this!  Got up relatively early to go grocery shopping.  It was a beautiful morning, sun shining but a small bite to the air.  I did realize today that I prefer my local Vons to my local Ralphs, but I had some coupons to Ralphs so that’s why I went there.  Probably won’t do that again though.

After that, I hung out at home and did some of that cleaning I’ve been threatening to do.  Bathroom, kitchen, living room.  Han helped by doing the vacuuming which I don’t love to do.  Then we watched “Fiddler on the Roof” which I had never seen.  I made it through most of it, only dozing a couple times.

And now we are about ready to head out to a gig that Han is playing, not with Acoustic Band or Rock Band but as percussionist and guitarist for another act.  It’ll be fun.  It’s the first of two nights at this same venue, so we’ll be doing the same thing again tomorrow.

But also tomorrow, it’s the return of Book Club!  It’s been quite a while since we last met so I’m excited if only to hang out with Heather and Barb again.

Tomorrow is also the last day of NaBloPoMo.  I’m pretty proud of myself for doing as well as I did!  And there are still several blog posts floating around in my head that I want to get to, so we’ll see how December goes.

That’s what happened last night.  My first drunk blog post.  Hee!  And except for the typical drunken exaggeration (maybe yesterday morning wasn’t the best of my entire life, but it was certainly quite nice), I still stand behind my post.  It was a good Thanksgiving and today has been good, too.  I slept ’til noon (!) and then got some lunch for myself, Han & a client of his that was over.  I made up a grocery list and a menu for next week, watched my recorded episodes of “Top Chef” and just relaxed.

We’re getting ready now to head out for Han’s Rock Band gig which should be a fun time.  Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving!

I haven’t gone to bed yet, so even though it’s “technically” the day after Thanksgiving, meaning I would have missed another day of blogging in November…it’s still the same day in which I woke up, meaning I have not slept since it was “actually” Thanksgiving.

It was a great day, despite all of the indications in which it might not have been a good one.  I woke up naturally at 9 am. Read my book on the couch (finished it even!) and watched the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, something I don’t know I’ve ever done before in my life, at least from start to finish.  The rain came down and I opened one of the front windows to let in the sound and the wind.  It was one of the most perfect mornings of my life. The scent of the freshly blooming jade in front of our house, the smell of the ocean, the absolute perfect cadence of the raindrops made it simply supreme.

I am typing this now after our Thanksgiving outing at a good friend’s house (replete with three different kinds of turkey no less plus a ham!), and my typing is less than accurate.  There are many instances of deleting and backspacing.  But despite that, I am content.  We were with people who have been part of our lives for longer than I realized and as we conversed and shared the holiday, I was struck by how close we have become without being caught up with the day-to-day ups and downs of life.

Combining the shocking death of Scott yesterday, and really, all the others we’ve lost this year, with such a holiday of celebration, was an uplifting experience in a very uncommon way. I feel so lucky in so many ways, and it felt so good to share this day with these people who are family in a non-traditional sense.  My family (Mom, Dad, Sister), in particular, have never been extremely traditional with this holiday, and so, as I’ve grown older, it does not quite demand the particular emotion that many others feel at this time.  But it does not diminish the fact that I care deeply and am so very grateful and thankful to my immediate family for their enthusiastic and unrelenting support.  I am confident that even though we (or I) chose to not be together on this day that they know beyond any doubt how much I adore them and so desperately rely on their unconditional love at all times. 

It is with an abundant heart that I say I have no regrets in my life, and that I am doing everything I would do if I had the chance to do it all exactly like I wanted to.  I hope whoever reads this feels the same.

Han called me from LA this afternoon where he is up doing some music work.  He called to tell me that he had learned that our friend Scott Zensen had died today of a heart attack.  He was 50. 

Scott came to my birthday show last week and was thoughtful enough to give me a book of poetry.  He was a very unassuming guy who absolutely LOVED the music scene here in San Diego, particularly the group of artists Han & I are very close to and connected with.  He maintained an online music ‘zine called MyWeek in Music and I contributed some poetry to it off and on.  I often wondered how he managed to stick with it.  It was a labor of love through and through.  His enthusiasm was pure and I know that everyone appreciated his support.

It is yet another shocking and sad death this year.  There have been way too many.

It’s tough for me to find time in the morning to write.  And in the evening, well, I’m not too inspired. So my dilemma tonight is when to create time to create.

I write this at ten ’til midnight after falling asleep on the couch.  That’s the other thing.  I just get tired at night.

In the past, in my prolific time, I would write when I would go out, to the coffeehouses and yes, even the bars.  I was a regular at the Ould Sod on Wednesday nights with my journal and a Guiness (or three) listening to Loam/The Hatchet Brothers.  But that’s not how it works anymore, and I haven’t been able to replace that time.

I owe some poems to a friend who is guest editor for the San Diego Poetry Annual, and he asked me to submit some work to him.  Thankfully, the deadline has been extended to mid-December, so I’ll have to carve out some time and eke out some inspiration somwhere along the way.  Maybe while I’m doing that, I’ll also figure out how to put some exercise back in my routine.

And yet it also seems like I haven’t had a moment to breathe.  Work ’til 5 pm, run errands after work and get home at 6 pm. Prep dinner.  Watch TV for 15 minutes.  Make dinner.  Help Han get things together for his trip to LA tomorrow night. Eat & watch a little bit more TV.  More business work.  Now it’s 11 pm and I feel both ready for bed and ready to keep working.

On the other hand, I noticed this morning in the shower that I can watch the sunrise from the window as I shampoo my hair.  And the smell of rain was in the air when I left the office today.

I feel like I’ve been going non-stop and even now that I’m back home, I can’t seem to feel quite settled yet.  I’ll work on it.  Hee!

I did not accomplish much of anything today.  I had high hopes but the fatigue factor overrode just about everything else.  I did get out to the grocery store and that was about it.  No laundry, business or photo editing got done at all.  I did watch “Bowfinger,” “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off,” “The Prince & Me,” and part of “Smokin’ Aces.”  We also watched taped episodes of “House,” “CSI:New York,” “Pushing Daisies,” and “Saturday Night Live.”  I also read a little bit and made chili and cornbread for dinner.

Tomorrow back to work and this week planning for the holidays.  Plus doing all the stuff I should have done today.

I missed a day! But it’s all good. 

Thursday evening, me, Han & DK drove up to LA to my folks’ house where my sister had arrived to retrieve her boy who has been here with the g’parents since early November. We hung out a bit then, Han & I went to our hotel and DK got to stay at the house.  The plan was to meet at Disneyland at 9 am to get going on the joy.

I was still pretty tired from my birthday night, which was really fun. My little tribe all came out and the music was exceptional.  I even got up and performed my part on the Cathryn Beeks Ordeal song “Rescue Me.”  It was a rush and really fun to perform in front of such an inviting crowd and knowing I was among people who care about me.  I maintained through the night, remembering to drink water between drinks.  My drink of choice was vodka/cranberry and they were tasty : )  But when the show lasts ’til 1 am and then you do the requisite curbside hangout after the gig, it means you don’t go to sleep until 3 or so.  And I had to work the next day.  I was draggin’ but managed to get a lot done.

So now it’s Friday morning, and the plan, as I mentioned was to meet at 9 am.  Well, my alarm does not go off and I wake up and see that it’s 8:22 am. Panic ensues.  It doesn’t matter your destination, when you don’t wake up on time, your day is already a bit skewed.  S, T & DK were already at the park when I called at 8:25am, just getting to the parking lot.  So Han & I rushed to get there and met up with them by 9:30 or so. Okay, crisis over, but not the start we wanted.

But then, something great happened. We got on Pirates in less than 5 minutes, and then did the same thing on Haunted Mansion, Thunder Mountain and Splash Mountain.  It was awesome!  We expected it to be insanely crowded because it was the start of their holiday decor and special shows etc.  But it stayed like that most of the day.  ToonTown is where we waited the longest, and frankly, I could have easily skipped that part, but the kids were into it so that was cool.

Then there was some downtime, for me at least.  They rode Matterhorn (too bumpy for me), then the kids did Autopia and then S & T did the submarine.  DK did rockets & S & T did the Astro Blasters. I was just waiting for Space Mountain.  I think Haunted Mansion is my favorite because it’s the one I buy into the most every single time.  And now that it’s decorated as “Nightmare Before Christmas,” it’s even cooler.  But Space Mountain is spectacular.  It’s been improved over the years and now the music, lights and build-up really make it awesome.  When I ride the other coasters, Thunder Mountain, Splash Mountain, California Screamin (in CA Adventure), I scream and love the wind whipping past me.  But I noticed that on Space Mountain, I don’t scream.  Maybe a little flutter here or there but not like the others.  It’s dark and cool and the speed is almost soothing.  I keep my eyes open and my arms up and let it take me through its curves and twists.  It’s relaxing and thrilling at the same time.  It was exactly what I needed.

From there, we went to Fantasyland where S & T rode Dumbo while Han, DK & I rode the Snow White & Pinochio rides.  When it’s not as crowded like it was yesterday, I am so much more interested in the details.  Every single thing in the whole park has a purpose, whether it’s to contribute to the magic or to just be aesthetically pleasing.  Now that we have annual passes again, I’d love to use one visit at least to just focus on those little things and the art that may often be overlooked.  Like the water fountain right inside the castle that has a bronze miniature statue of Sleeping Beauty and the Prince dancing.  Lovely.

Then it was time for Han & I to leave the group and head to his gig with the Acoustic Duo. Through no fault of our own but attributing it all to being outside the Magic Kingdom and back in the ‘real world’, things did not go smoothly.  We couldn’t find coffee, traffic was really heavy around the resort area and we didn’t have time to get anything to eat.  Once we left for the gig, about 1/2 an hour later than we had planned, we were greeted by bumper-to-bumper traffic on the freeway we had to take.  What should have been a 30 minute drive ended up being a 75-80 minute drive.  And it wasn’t just that.  It was that there was no reason.  We never saw an accident or any other kind of reason for the hold-up.  And it was the kind of drive where when you changed lanes to get into the one that was moving, it immediately stopped and the lane you’d been in starts flowing.  It made for a frustrating drive not to mention the added anxiety of knowing we would be late.

But…once we got there (C was already there), it was fine.  The opener had also been in traffic and was just getting her sound check.  We unloaded, set up and had time to spare before they opened doors. The show itself was great.  The people (in the audience and at the venue) just loved ‘em.  We’ll be able to go back and play there again and hopefully start to build up a good following there.  The venue itself is really cool.  It’s an old music store and world art & artifiact museum. Lots of cool African masks, old drums and various other stuff.  I took photos of the luthier work area in the back and some of the masks and old bells and stuff that were around.

The drive back to Anaheim was way easier.  We got some fast food and watched TV until we fell asleep.

This morning, I drove back to my folks’ place to see my sister & T off.  We decided to let DK sleep in.  They ended up staying at the park ’til about 11:30 pm and they were exhausted.  So she’s asleep, my folks took S & T to the airport.  I’ll be here when they get back then DK & I will head back to the hotel to collect Han and then head back to San Diego.

My goals for the weekend are to organize myself, clean the house and do some music business work that I need to catch up on. 

And when I start to feel anxious about something, I’ll do my best to remember that feeling of closing my eyes just for a moment and taking a deep breath as the countdown begins (5, 4, 3, 2…) and Space Mountain unleashes its sleek speed and I drink in the controlled recklessness.

We’re getting ready to head out of town again so this is just a placeholder really to stay in the NaBloPoMo game.

Here’s what you can look forward to: photos, a birthday re-cap and more!

So far it’s been good.  I received a lovely bouquet of flowers from my aunt Mia in Sweden, thanks, Mia!  I also got a bottle of wine from a co-worker, spoke to my sister, parents, Heather and received some other kind message from other friends. 

Tonight is a birthday show in my honor, so to speak, featuring many of my friends who are all amazing talents.  It’s almost time to leave for that so I’ll see you on the other side of it all!  Here’s to a better year!