I need to find something new. I have no idea what. The things that formerly brought me joy, even helped define my life, no longer inspire me or draw happiness from my well of emotion.
I went to Java Joe’s tonight to listen to some touring songwriters. While they were good & I enjoyed them, I didn’t feel like I thought I would. The realization made me sad.
This question of what’s next has been a constant in my life for at least the last 5-6, maybe 7 years. I think it’s contributed to my depression. I’ve made what I thought were significant changes, but it hasn’t been enough or something. I’ve stumbled along, going to work, writing a bit here & there, with glimpses of bliss, contentment, accomplishment, but nothing in full focus.